Thursday, September 30, 2004

Kerry Looks And Sounds Presidential, Wins First Debate Convincingly
"We Got Poland!"

Bush slouching at the podium, too tired apparently to stand up straight. Bush smirking, or looking irritated like he doesn't want to be there. Bush saying the same catch phrases repeatedly, hoping it'll work just three more nights. Bush in reference to Iraq saying that the enemy attacked us. Kerry says that bin Laden attacked us. Bush takes a mulligan: "I know that!"

Wednesday, September 29, 2004

I Have Also Used The French Defense While Playing Black For Some Success

I've been reading columns by War Nerd. Chris at Incoming Signals had sent a link to War Nerd's column with his take on the history of the French military (as opposed to the usual stuff you read.)

Also recommended:

War Nerd: It's Not Nam, But It'll Do

War Nerd: Afghanistan: What Went Right?

War Nerd: Iraq: the “Duh!” Theory

Monday, September 27, 2004

39 Is Such A Fun Age

Last week my pal Def Jeff showed me a photo of The Donnas with Kirsten Dunst. Kirsten is standing next to my favorite Donna, Donna R.

I said: "Five girls that are 25 or under ... should be good odds that at least one of them has Daddy Issues."

Saturday, September 25, 2004

Crappy Band Reunites And Me Without A Handgun Due To Stupid Waiting List Law

Somewhere, some younger members of my generation probably give a shit about this. Father, forgive them; for they know not what they do.

Tuesday, September 21, 2004

Quote Of The Week (So Far)

Tonight on "Hardball," Chris Matthews brought up the possibilities of whether: 1) Democrats planted the forged Bush/Guard memos in a smear campaign, or 2) Republicans planted the forgeries, knowing they'd be found as fake and this would then focus blame on the Democrats.

Former Bush speechwriter David Frum said: "I think it was the Masons."

(And Memogate pales in comparision to Rather's attempt to whitewash the Crime of the Twentieth Century ...)

Monday, September 20, 2004

Lowlight: The Under-utilization Of Malcolm-Jamal Warner

The highlight of tonight's "Listen Up" premiere on CBS was Jason Alexander singing the following to the tune of "Battle Hymn of the Republic":

I go to foreign countries and there's soccer everywhere
They've got big screens set up for the World Cup in the village square
But on TV in the US soccer gets a zero share
Cuz we know soccer blows


No one ever scores in soccer
If there's a highlight it's a shocker
You win by saying "Referee!
That player hurt my wittle knee!"
We hate this stupid game

Friday, September 10, 2004


I scrolled down this main page of this blog and thought: What am I doing here? Auditioning for a columnist's slot with Page 2 at

(Ah geez, Team USA - blowing a lead in the third period and losing to a team whose roster reads like a namecheck of my relatives standing in line for mojakka at the Finn Picnic in Perth, North Dakota, on a Sunday afternoon in July?)

I'll be out until September 20th. In the meantime, check out New Patriot, a recently-launched blog that proclaims itself "a group of proudly leftist Minnesota bloggers not content to sit on the sidelines."

Thursday, September 09, 2004

Can't Get Enough

The NFL regular season started tonight. In honor of this, I'ven been listening to my favorite piece of NFL play-by-play, as announced by the purple-and-gold-kneepad-wearing Paul Allen:

Here it is - the season's on the line ... two receivers left and right ... McCown ... takes the snap ... he steps up ... he's all by himself ... fires into the end zone ... CAUGHT! ... TOUCHDOWN!! ... NO!!! ... NO!!! ... THE CARDINALS HAVE KNOCKED THE VIKINGS OUT OF THE PLAYOFFS!

Wednesday, September 08, 2004

One Of Those Silly Thoughts That Bothers Me For Days

The Czech forecheck was made popular by the Czechoslovakian national teams of the seventies. So does the Slovakian hockey team refer to it as "the Czech forecheck" or do they claim it as their own?

Tuesday, September 07, 2004

World Cup North American Quarterfinal #1

I lucked out over the weekend and thanks to my great friend Bjerk, I was able to score a couple of $70 seats for tonight's USA vs. Russia World Cup hockey game for only $10 each. My pal Ben and I had wonderful 23rd row seats in section 125. Unfortunately, we also had some boneheads behind us who probably couldn't tell the difference between a blue line and a clothesline. They spent a good part of the first period talking about a two-stroke engine. A few choice quotes from them:

Q: "Is this an elimination game?" A: "No."

"Jordan Leopold is playing tonight."

"How come Marian Gaborik isn't playing for Russia?"

Q: "Is that Rob Blake?" A: "Yes."

"That's their new flag." (Referring to the Russian one.)

But these folks weren't loud, so they were more amusing than irritating.

I'd bitch about the lack of a sellout, but until those cheap tickets came along I was content to sit at home and watch the game on ESPN2.

Strange things seen in the crowd:

- A dude carrying a sign that simply said "Rocky IV."

- Doug Woog

- Four or five guys in Winnipeg Jets jerseys holding up a sign that said "Bring Back Our Jets."

- People holding up a big American flag that had a black-and-white image of Jim Morrison in the middle of it. When I think international hockey, I think Lizard King.

- A guy wearing a shirt that said "Support Our Troops" on the back and "Now Is Time To Choose Your Country And God" on the front. Me, I'm a big Zeus guy.

Anyway, the U.S. won behind a superb effort by Keith Tkachuk and advanced to the semifinals - also to be played at the Xcel. They will face Finland, unless Slovakia upsets Canada tomorrow; then they will face the Czech Republic.

And after years of yelling it after life's little triumphs (ala Homer Simpson), it was a freakin' blast to yell "USA! USA! USA!" in the proper context.

Friday, September 03, 2004

A Few World Cup Thoughts

I watched some of Finland vs. Germany yesterday. Suomi's Miikka Kiprusoff has yet to give up a goal. Jere Lehtinen scored an awesome goal ... he was in the slot and fired a no-look, top-shelf backhand that was a rocket. Barry Melrose loved this one - said he hadn't seen a backhand goal like that in the last twenty years.

Russia vs. the USA last night. Russia is F-A-S-T. They had been written off coming into this tourney, but right now I have them #2 in my book. (Though I haven't seen Sweden yet.)

The pace of the Finland/Germany game was WCHA-like compared to the Stanley Cup-like pace of the Russia/USA game.

Ron Wilson did a nice juggling job tonight to put in some young guns who put a fire into the USA while they knocked of Slovakia. Still, it was Slovakia - the US needs to continue to play uptempo, no-mailing-it-in hockey to advance any further in this tourney. There's a good chance they'll face Russia again in the quarterfinals.

I still think Canada is the team to beat in this thing. Too bad tomorrow's Canada vs. Russia game isn't on ESPN ... or for that matter Sweden vs. Finland.

Wednesday, September 01, 2004

Strapped For Cash, Can't Make The Xcel, Instead I'll Just Link Away

Canada looks like the team to beat in the World Cup of Hockey.

Jeremy Roenick was a hilariously bad homer in the ESPN2 booth last night; referring to Canada's jerseys as being "puke yellow" and then a few minutes later admitting his bias by saying he hoped the US would "kick the Canadians butts."

Saturday's Finland vs. Sweden game could have some "sending of messages" (i.e. scraps and scrums) like last night's USA vs. Canada game. It sounds like Finland is playing tough-guy hockey. Barry Melrose had a great quote about the matchup: "These two teams HATE each other! ... They absolutely HATE each other!! ... This is something that dates back to the Viking days!!"

A few good links with which to track the World Cup:

World Cup official site

World Cup Blog