Wednesday, October 19, 2005

Writer, Essayist, Zinester

There are times in my head, for whatever reasons, that my mind goes too many ways and then as a result I need to focus on less things in order to be effective in my creative process.

So this weblog is on indefinite hiatus. My zine and podcast will continue.

Thanks for reading.

Tuesday, October 18, 2005

Some of Us Do Not Find Every Weathly Person You Can Scrap Up That Interesting
This Is News?

My least favorite part of the Strib re-design? The need to give us a page-and-three-quarters on some 25-year old rich kid who really hasn't done much.

Sunday, October 16, 2005

Sports Sports Sports

What a terrific sports weekend. The teams I love won. In football North Dakota beat Minnesota-Duluth to stay unbeaten, remain on top in the NCC, and hold onto their national #1 ranking. In hockey, the Sioux swept Northeastern at home.

But it's as much fun in sports to cheer against teams. And I am blessed in that department also. The Vikings lost a game on the road, to no one's surprise. Les Steckel, please report to Winter Park.

The Gopher football team choked away a game at home against Wisconsin ... oh no, they didn't get Paul Bunyan's Axe!! Good thing they got that Brown Jug! Maybe they can also get the Pig Trophy! They play for such cute nothings in the average football conference that is the Big Ten Little Eleven.

The Gopher hockey team gutted out a split on the road against a tough, tough nonconference opponent. Oh wait, they lost and tied at home againt Alaska-Fairbanks. (The total for the weekend was three points for Gopher freshmen, fourteen for Sioux freshmen.)

And Notre Dame lost at home to Southern Cal. This one might be the best, because Notre Dame has the hoariest cliches (outside of Little Eleven trophies) that you can imagine: wake up the echoes, ghosts present at the field, touchdown Jesus, etc. On Saturday, they broke out another hoary cliche and wore their green jerseys. Big deal! It takes a lot more than a different color scheme to beat the Trojans. My new hero Matt Leinart led a game-winning drive late in the fourth, including a perfect clutch pass on a fourth-and-nine. After the game, Leinart dared suggest that USC is truly the team with the supernatural on its side: "They were looking down from up above and we got in."

Friday, October 14, 2005

They Used the Mann Act on Chuck Berry, Why Not the Purple?

The Vikings sex cruise story gets weirder and weirder every day.

The Strib recently released the names of the players who were allegedly on the cruise and I am proud to say that none of these bums play on my fantasy football team, The Moe Greens. Then again, there are no good fantasy players on the Purple so far this season.

There are also allegations that some of the ladies (of the night?) who attended the party were flown in from out-of-state. I wonder if the players know about the 1099s they will have to send come tax time.

Tuesday, October 11, 2005

I'm Eagerly Anticipating This Movie, Think Ann Coulter Will Be My Date?

Good Night and Good Luck opens this Friday. Journalism Legend Edward R. Murrow vs. Slimeball Senator Joseph McCarthy.

Monday, October 03, 2005

Please Please Plug In, Bob

This morning I watched the first hour of the Bob Dylan: No Direction Home DVD and all I keep thinking was: folkies give me the creeps. For every authentic dude like Woody Guthrie, you get a dozen yahoos playing dressup and trying to act all "authentic."

In all the late-fifties/early-sixties footage, easily the most exciting guy I saw was Gene Vincent - who we see kicking rock 'n' roll ass with the Blue Caps while they tear through Little Richard's "Rip It Up." Plus it sounded a ton more authentic than anything happening in the Village.

Saturday, October 01, 2005

But Grand Forks Has One University, Fargo-Moorhead Has Three Colleges

While reading up on The Deaths, I found out that Grand Forks is considered a coke town - at least to Fargo people:

"Fargo is a drinking town. Grand Forks is more of a coke town. There's a saying: It always snows in Grand Forks."

Tuesday, September 27, 2005

You're Next, Galileo

Last year the Dover, Pennsylvania school district board ordered that students be taught about intelligent design. There is currently a trial underway to rule on that decision. If there was any doubt remaining that intelligent design is a pseudo-scientific front scheme for Christian wackjobs, check out this quote from a school board member in Dover:

"Nearly 2,000 years ago someone died on a cross for us," said board member William Buckingham, who urged his colleagues to include intelligent design in ninth-grade science classes. "Shouldn't we have the courage to stand up for him?"

There ya go - if you dare teach real science in the classroom, you'll make Baby Jesus cry.

Monday, September 26, 2005

"Sorry About That, Chief"

RIP, Don Adams, who not only was Maxwell Smart in "Get Smart," but was the voice of childhood fave Tennessee Tuxedo. (My viewing of Tennessee's show in the afternoon was too many times pre-empted by Watergate hearings - thank YOU, Tricky Dick!)

It's been years since I have seen an episode of "Get Smart," plus I've only seen about fifteen minutes of one Austin Powers movie. Needless to say - in the secret-agent-parody genre, "Get Smart" was about (insert number between twenty and forty) times funnier.

Sunday, September 25, 2005

Using Such Comparisions Rocks Him Like a Hurricane

Strib sports columnist Jim Souhan is a big fan of using Hurricane Katrina analogies:

Wrting about the Vikings coach:

Tice is displaying the leadership skills that made New Orleans the tourist attraction it is today.

Writing about the Gophers offense:

When your running game covers more ground than the average Category 4 hurricane, the quarterback is asked to not mess up.

Witty stuff, Jimmy. Here's a reference in case you need to spark the muse.

Thursday, September 22, 2005

Hello Hooray

Hot on the heels of my finding out about "The White Shadow" DVD, Migwire lets us know that Alice Cooper's Good to See You Again is also coming out on DVD ... the SAME DAY as "Shadow"! This movie occasionally would pop up as "long wait" and rarely as "short wait" in my Netflix queue, only to drop back down to the Saved section as "unknown." Must have been some quasi-official limited release. Hopefully this new release will correct that.

I love the original Alice Cooper band. (And have no doubt, they were a BAND with the former Vincent Furnier as the frontman.) ("She asked me why the singer's name was Alice / I said 'Listen, baby, you really wouldn't understand.'") Their Greatest Hits album is easily one of my all-time faves.

I'll be playing some Alice Cooper on my next podcast, which I hope to record this weekend.

Wednesday, September 21, 2005

Couldn't Think of Witty Dylan Lyric To Insert Here

I've been looking forward to seeing "Bob Dylan: No Direction Home" for quite a while and was planning on watching it on PBS next week. But then I remembered that the only time I have ever seen any cool rock 'n' roll show (Austin City Limits aside) on PBS is during a pledge drive. During all other times of the year, that network is rock-free - only breaking out the riffage when they want to hit us up for some money.

So I put the Dylan documentary at the top of my Netflix queue - it's already available for rental. Even if PBS is playing this one straight, I'll have the pause and rewind options available.

Tuesday, September 20, 2005

The Babs Bush Drunk Gene Lives On!

I'm guessing that Dubya and his kin get their drunk genes from his mom, the fugly former first lady. Pappy Bush ran the CIA and I don't think you can do that job while drunk, if only because you should be sober when negotiating with the Mafia to do your dirty work.

The Babs Bush Drunk Gene Roll Call:

Son and Momma's Boy, George W.

Granddaughter, Noelle Bush (Jeb's daughter)

Grandson, John Ellis Bush (Jeb's son) (Look - he's biting his tongue trying not to say: "Don't you know who I am??")

Granddaughter, Jenna Bush (Dubya's daughter)

Granddaughters, Jenna and Barbara Bush (Dubya's daughters)

And when while at the Astrodome visiting Katrina evacuees, Babs may have been drunk when she said: "Everyone is so overwhelmed by the hospitality. And so many of the people in the arena here, you know, were underprivileged anyway, so this, this is working very well for them."

But I suspect that she is just plain mean.

Thursday, September 15, 2005


"The White Shadow" is coming out on DVD. Awesome. is saying the release date is November 8th, but Netflix is saying that it is October 18th. Let's hope for October.

What's the starting lineup those first two seasons, before Jackson was tragically killed in that liquor store holdup? (Sadly ironic: Jackson had beat his drinking problem early in season one.)

My guess:

C - Coolidge
G - Thorpe
G - Hayward
F - Jackson
F - Reese

Or was Jackson a guard and Hayward a forward? I don't remember well enough, nor do I know basketball well enough. I just know that "Cool" was the center and that Thorpe ran the offense.

Wednesday, September 14, 2005

"This Is Show Business, Baby. No Business, No Show."

I finally watched The Harder They Come last night. I didn't think it was possible, but now the soundtrack sounds even better. As Greil Marcus once wrote: "The Rolling Stones would have killed to make this album."

Wednesday, September 07, 2005

"Def Leppard is not a song."

Here's a brief audio clip from a Ryan Adams show in the 7th Street Entry in October of 2000. This was a great show - unlike his show the next year, which sucked.

The second guy who yells "Two Minutes to Midnight!" was me. I actually wasn't copying the first guy to yelled it. Adams had earlier been talking about the new Iron Maiden album and I had wanted to yell it for a while. He responded. I remember him pointing in my direction and cracking up after I yelled it.

Monday, September 05, 2005

I Love Keith Olbermann (Part II)

Keith Olbermann's editorial on "Countdown" this evening:

The "City" of Louisiana

Secretary of Homeland Security Michael Chertoff said it all, starting his news briefing Saturday afternoon: "Louisiana is a city that is largely underwater..."

Well there's your problem right there.

If ever a slip-of-the-tongue defined a government's response to a crisis, this was it.

The seeming definition of our time and our leaders had been their insistence on slashing federal budgets for projects that might’ve saved New Orleans. The seeming characterization of our government that it was on vacation when the city was lost, and could barely tear itself away from commemorating V.J. Day and watching Monty Python's Flying Circus, to at least pretend to get back to work. The seeming identification of these hapless bureaucrats: their pathetic use of the future tense in terms of relief they could’ve brought last Monday and Tuesday — like the President, whose statements have looked like they’re being transmitted to us by some kind of four-day tape-delay.

But no. The incompetence and the ludicrous prioritization will forever be symbolized by one gaffe by of the head of what is ironically called “The Department of Homeland Security”: “Louisiana is a city…”

Politician after politician — Republican and Democrat alike — has paraded before us, unwilling or unable to shut off the "I-Me" switch in their heads, condescendingly telling us about how moved they were or how devastated they were — congenitally incapable of telling the difference between the destruction of a city and the opening of a supermarket.

And as that sorry recital of self-absorption dragged on, I have resisted editorial comment. The focus needed to be on the efforts to save the stranded — even the internet's meager powers were correctly devoted to telling the stories of the twin disasters, natural... and government-made.

But now, at least, it is has stopped getting exponentially worse in Mississippi and Alabama and New Orleans and Louisiana (the state, not the city). And, having given our leaders what we know now is the week or so they need to get their act together, that period of editorial silence I mentioned, should come to an end.

No one is suggesting that mayors or governors in the afflicted areas, nor the federal government, should be able to stop hurricanes. Lord knows, no one is suggesting that we should ever prioritize levee improvement for a below-sea-level city, ahead of $454 million worth of trophy bridges for the politicians of Alaska.

But, nationally, these are leaders who won re-election last year largely by portraying their opponents as incapable of keeping the country safe. These are leaders who regularly pressure the news media in this country to report the reopening of a school or a power station in Iraq, and defies its citizens not to stand up and cheer. Yet they couldn't even keep one school or power station from being devastated by infrastructure collapse in New Orleans — even though the government had heard all the "chatter" from the scientists and city planners and hurricane centers and some group whose purposes the government couldn't quite discern... a group called The U.S. Army Corps of Engineers.

And most chillingly of all, this is the Law and Order and Terror government. It promised protection — or at least amelioration — against all threats: conventional, radiological, or biological.

It has just proved that it cannot save its citizens from a biological weapon called standing water.

Mr. Bush has now twice insisted that, "we are not satisfied," with the response to the manifold tragedies along the Gulf Coast. I wonder which "we" he thinks he's speaking for on this point. Perhaps it's the administration, although we still don't know where some of them are. Anybody seen the Vice President lately? The man whose message this time last year was, 'I'll Protect You, The Other Guy Will Let You Die'?

I don't know which 'we' Mr. Bush meant.

For many of this country's citizens, the mantra has been — as we were taught in Social Studies it should always be — whether or not I voted for this President — he is still my President. I suspect anybody who had to give him that benefit of the doubt stopped doing so last week. I suspect a lot of his supporters, looking ahead to '08, are wondering how they can distance themselves from the two words which will define his government — our government — "New Orleans."

For him, it is a shame — in all senses of the word. A few changes of pronouns in there, and he might not have looked so much like a 21st Century Marie Antoinette. All that was needed was just a quick "I'm not satisfied with my government's response." Instead of hiding behind phrases like "no one could have foreseen," had he only remembered Winston Churchill's quote from the 1930's. "The responsibility," of government, Churchill told the British Parliament "for the public safety is absolute and requires no mandate. It is in fact, the prime object for which governments come into existence."

In forgetting that, the current administration did not merely damage itself — it damaged our confidence in our ability to rely on whoever is in the White House.

As we emphasized to you here all last week, the realities of the region are such that New Orleans is going to be largely uninhabitable for a lot longer than anybody is yet willing to recognize. Lord knows when the last body will be found, or the last artifact of the levee break, dug up. Could be next March. Could be 2100. By then, in the muck and toxic mire of New Orleans, they may even find our government's credibility.

Somewhere, in the City of Louisiana.

Thursday, August 25, 2005

So Long Suckers

I'll be on vacation through Labor Day.

Wednesday, August 24, 2005

Urban Wildlife

I just noted my cat staring out the kitchen window with alert interest. I looked out the window to see a couple of raccoons make their way down the alley, doing some snooping around for food. When they got to my building's dumpster, one of the raccoons climbed up the adjoining telephone pole and hopped onto the dumpster. It then proceeded to peek under one of the dumpster top doors (they're plastic) and look for food. It didn't find any, then had a heck of time getting back down that telephone pole. It finally crawled down backwards and the pair made their way down the alley. They can move fast when they have to.

I like raccoons, they look like little burglars.

Tuesday, August 23, 2005

Better My Money Go to Venezuela than the Saudis

I wonder if Christian wackjob Pat Robertson prays for me. I buy my gasoline at CITGO, which is a wholly-owned subsidiary of the Venezuelan government.

Nah, he probably wants to have me killed also. Stupid fucker.

Sunday, August 21, 2005

Union Yes

We here at Exiled on Main Streeet support workers and labor unions. Go AMFA mechanics! Aside from NWA management and their moms, no one in Minnesota likes "Northworst Airlines." The arrogance of their management over the years has led to this disdain.

And we feel little sympathy for the airline industry's slide since 9/11. Maybe if they had done a better job of keeping box cutters off of their flights, they wouldn't be in the tank now. Northwest Airlines and their replacement scab mechanics can go (fill in the blank) theirselves. Repeatedly.

Saturday, August 20, 2005

I Love Keith Olbermann

Last night he declared drug addict Rush Limbaugh to be today's worst person in the world.

Also, the druggie's ratings are taking a beating here in the Twin Cities.

Saturday, August 13, 2005

Bob Dylan, Beer Drinker

I just finished reading Bob Dylan's Chronicles: Volume One. It's pretty interesting stuff. For being so cryptic in interviews and song, he shoots straight in his life's tale.

Some of my favorite passages were in the final chapter, where he writes about being part of the New York City folk scene in the early sixties.

The song I wrote was inspired by the fallout shelter craze that had blossomed out of the Cold War. I suppose some considered it radical to come up with a song like that, but to me it wasn't radical at all. In Northern Minnesota fallout shelters didn't catch on, had no effect whatsoever on the Iron Range. As far as communists went, there wasn't any paranoia about them. People weren't scared of them, seemed to be a big to-do over nothing. Commies were symbolic of travelers from outer space. Mine owners were more to be feared, more of an enemy, anyway.


I was fortunate enough to have the regular gig at the Gaslight and wasn't on any wild goose chase to go anywhere. I could breathe. I was free. Didn't feel constrained. Between sets I mostly hung out, drank shooters of Wild Turkey and iced Schlitz at the Kettle of Fish Tavern next door and played cards upstairs at the Gaslight. Things were working out fine.

Friday, August 12, 2005

An Open Letter from UND President Charles Kupchella

An open letter to the NCAA.

I should have pointed out earlier that UND doesn't have an American Indian mascot. They have an American Indian nickname and use an American Indian logo on their hockey uniforms.

Saturday, August 06, 2005

Ban Will Mean More Money for Makers of UND Apparel

The NCAA has banned the use of American Indian mascots by sports teams during its postseason tournaments.

So when the Sioux hockey team next makes the NCAA postseason, I imagine they will be sporting a classy-looking throwback jersey that says "North Dakota" in block letters that run diagonally down the sweater. Replica throwback home white jerseys and road green jerseys available to the fans mean more green for the makers and sellers of Sioux jerseys.

As for the ban, Neil Young and Crazy Horse were unavailable for comment.

Thursday, August 04, 2005

The Truth Behind Street Accounting

Some folks are running into problems with blogging and work. I say blog away and write whatever you want. Damn the torpedoes and full speed ahead. I'll start:

My office is tiny and gets too warm in the summer. I don't have enough desk space and many times end up forming piles of paperwork on the floor.

Plus my boss sleeps too much, sometimes doesn't shower until lunchtime, has been known to crack a beer or two in the afternoon, sometimes works while hung over, and interrupts work every afternoon just to watch "Pardon the Interruption." Besides not being very bright, the bastard also doesn't pay well.

Thursday, July 28, 2005

Mead (the Drink, Not the Notebooks You Favor)

After checking out a feature on the Real Beer website, for whatever reason I now very much want to sample some mead.

I've done some surfing and have found that France 44, The Liquor Depot, and Zipp's may sell mead. There are meaderies in both Minnesota and Wisconsin.

Has anybody out there tried mead? Please share your thoughts via comment or email. Thanks!

Wednesday, July 27, 2005

Didn't You?

I'm currently reading Like a Rolling Stone: Bob Dylan at the Crossroads by Greil Marcus. A whole book just about one song? Sure! Like Dave Marsh's Louie Louie, which also dealt with one song, it's a great read.

One enjoyable part of the book are when different people talk about when they first heard the song. Tonight I read a segment where a girl in the UK first heard the song while at university (or as we call it here in the States, "college.") Being raised on punk, she was unfamiliar with Dylan's music. She was in a working-class pub and "Like a Rolling Stone" came on the jukebox. The whole bar stopped their conversations and begun gleefully singing along with all six minutes of it. Needless to say, she was amazed.

A couple of "Like a Rolling Stone" memories:

1) The trailer for In the Name of the Father from 1993. The trailer starts out with the song, and we soon see Daniel Day-Lewis and a friend enjoying a pint. Day-Lewis loudly sings the didn't you? that appears at the beginning of the first verse. (Oh and Day-Lewis acted circles around Tom Hanks in Philadelphia but got jobbed out of an Oscar. I'll save that rant for another time.)

2) Similarly, and a few years earlier ... Thanksgiving weekend, circa 1987. My cousin Dale and I arrive at a Dinkytown bar with our cousin Shannon and Dale's girlfriend. The girls grab a table and Dale and I go to the bar to get drinks. The song starts playing on the sound system just as we buy the drinks. When it comes to those two words, Dale and I grin at each other and loudly sing didn't you?

Monday, July 18, 2005


Great article in The Rake about T.D. Mischke. Him even doing a Summit Beer commercial is generally better than 99% of all talk radio out there.

Link via Chad at Fraters Libertas.

Monday, July 11, 2005

Exiled Radio

I've started a podcast.

Because blogging is sooooo last year.

Wednesday, July 06, 2005

Where Have You Gone Sal Putrid?

Liked Sunday's Doonesbury. Not as good as some of Tom Tomorrow's blogger cheap shots, but still fun.

Whenever I think about Doonesbury, I end up wondering what happened to Mike Doonesbury's little brother Sal. This site has a short bio:

Mike's younger brother, who is currently at university. First appeared as the only rebel student in a morass of "pre-med flamers", his philosophy being "we were put here to party". Trudeau's contribution to safer sex was to get him to sell condoms as "Doctor Whoopie".

Sal debuted in the strip as a college student the same time I was in college, so I naturally had an affinity for him. I had one strip taped in my room, a professor was lecturing and lecturing about the illegality of radar detectors and no one was responding. Then Sal shot up his hand and used a Thomas Jefferson argument to defend radar detectors. The professor yelled: "This is wonderful! One of you speaks! Who are you! What's your name??" Sal looked around nervously and asked: "Did I do something wrong?"

The Doonsebury site's FAQ states that Sal is still gainfully employed:

Benjamin Doonesbury (a.k.a. Sal Putrid) still works as regional sales manager at Dr. Whoopie, Inc.

Monday, July 04, 2005

To Readers of Exiled on Main Street:

Yes, it's been over six months since the last issue of the zine. I haven't folded it or given up writing.

I was working on a kinda secret writing project from March through last Thursday that took up my creative time. I hate to sound so cryptic, but I'm not comfortable discussing the project in this forum. If you're curious, send me an email and I'll clarify.

I'm taking a short breather and then it will be back to the pots of coffee and the scribblings in the notebook that lead to Exiled pieces. Summer is never my best time for generating new writing - the heat and the long days drag me down (I'm a nighttime, cool-to-cold weather writer) - but I'll be back in zine mode soon.

Oh, and also ... for the past few months I would kill a few hours here and there designing a font. Yes, I secretly want to be Chank. I hope to release the font this summer.

Thanks for your continued support.

Sunday, June 26, 2005

I Need To Go To The Homeland For Its Midsummer Holiday Sometime

The Finns want a piece of Italy's Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi. And who, when speaking proudly of their country's couisine, brings up HAM? It's a lunchmeat fer chrissakes.

Loved this part:

Finland began its midsummer holiday Friday, with most Finns leaving the cities to grill sausages over open fires, eat pickled herrings and drink beer and vodka.

Oddly enough (or maybe not, considering my genetics), I found myself last night enjoying beer, vodka, and pickled herring. And I also cooked some sausages hot dogs over an open fire on the George Foreman grill.

Saturday, June 25, 2005

Because He's Like an Evil Pillsbury Doughboy

Hey Karl Rove: It's not often that someone makes me want to use two of my favorite Susie Green quotes in one sentence, but you are both a four-eyed fuck AND a fat piece of shit. Anytime you wanna see how soft a liberal is ... just meet me in the alley on 34th Street between Harriet and Garfield, big boy. I'll drop you like a bag of cement.

Friday, June 24, 2005

The VP Is Too Smart To Be in Dreamland, So It's Safe to Assume He's Feeding Us Yet Again Another Line of Bullshit

Vice President Dick Cheney is once again wondering what it will take to get you into this car today:

We will succeed in Iraq, just like we did in Afghanistan. We will stand up a new government under an Iraqi-drafted constitution. We will defeat that insurgency, and, in fact, it will be an enormous success story."

This is the same man who said the following on "Meet the Press.":

Tim Russert: If your analysis is not correct, and we’re not treated as liberators, but as conquerors, and the Iraqis begin to resist, particularly in Baghdad, do you think the American people are prepared for a long, costly, and bloody battle with significant American casualties?

Vice President Cheney: Well, I don’t think it’s likely to unfold that way, Tim, because I really do believe that we will be greeted as liberators.

Notice he used the phrase "in fact" when he completely got the aftermath of the conquest of Iraq wrong and now uses it again in his prediction of the Iraq quagmire somehow becoming an enormous success story. Would you buy a used car from this man? No more American deaths in a war that was fed to Americans through repeated lines of bullshit. Bring the troops home from Iraq now.

Thursday, June 23, 2005

We Can All Breathe a Little Easier

The House of Representative has stepped up to the plate to help end the nationwide epidemic of flag-burning that threatens the very heart and soul of the good ol' US of A.

Wednesday, June 22, 2005

Rock 'n' Roll Tonight!

My friends Larry and Naked Jesus are on the bill tonight at the Uptown.

I'll be there around 9:30 p.m. Show up and buy me beer. Thanks.

Sunday, June 19, 2005

I Had Too Much To Dream Last Night

There's probably nothing more boring than hearing about someone's dreams, but tough luck. Weird dreams I had last night:

1) I'm walking along a walkway on the St. Paul riverfront with Norm Coleman. We're having a beer and he's pointing out all these huge construction projects that will be starting up soon. He's a genuinely nice guy, not at all salesman-slick, and I keep thinking I need to apologize on my blog for calling him Bush's butt boy.

2) I'm in the Country Bar sipping on kamikazes. I should know this is a dream because the bartender is a man, and the Country Bar only has female bartenders. Same dream - the next day the Country Bar closes and I'm helping clear out the bar's furniture and equipment. I grab my friend Scott, who's helping also, and yell: "They took the bar! The whole fucking bar!"

3) I'm at Chicago's Midway Airport and can't find my car in the parking ramp. Actually, I can't find the parking ramp. I think this is like a Seinfeld episode but not funny because I'm in it.

The whole night was filled with stuff like this. I may need a (hopefully dream-free) nap later today to clear my head.

Saturday, June 18, 2005

Friday, June 17, 2005

Karl Mueller, Rest in Peace

Way too young to go. My condolences to Karl's family and friends.

From the Strib:

Karl Mueller, the longtime bass player for Minneapolis' best-known rock band Soul Asylum, died early today after a long battle with throat cancer. He was 41.

Mueller co-founded Soul Asylum in 1984 along with friends Dave Pirner and Dan Murphy. The band enjoyed several years of underground and critical success, but was best known for its multi-platinum 1992 release "Grave Dancer's Union" and the hit "Runaway Train."

Mueller was diagnosed with throat cancer in May 2004 and underwent radiation treatment. The cancer was in remission when, in October, a legion of Twin Cities music scene veterans banded together for a "Rock for Karl" benefit concert at the Quest to help defray Mueller's medical costs.
Candidate Makes Solid Early Impression

Robert Fitzgerald dropped a comment on the "Beer for Breakfast" post below. He understood the title significance of the post and proceeded to quote a line from the Replacements' "Beer for Breakfast." It turns out that Robert is a candidate for the US Senate in Minnesota. Anybody who can quote obscure 'Mats tunes is halfway towards getting my vote.

Let's see if Mark Kennedy checks in with some Husker Du stuff ...

Thursday, June 16, 2005

What Exactly Did He Do For St. Paul Again?

Bush administration butt boy scores big-time. Senator Quimby - who likes him and why? I'm genuinely curious.

Wednesday, June 15, 2005

Beer for Breakfast

I drove by my favorite breakfast place, Curran's, last night and saw a sign saying that they now serve beer and wine. I always associate Curran's with: 1) Reading the sports page while diving into a #1 breakfast, and 2) A healthy, glowing coffee buzz as I walk out.

It'll be strange to see folks tipping back a few while I chow down those eggs and American fries. Then again, I also wonder if they'll have Summit.

Saturday, June 11, 2005

End Your Hunger Strikes!

Hatch sister babes cleared in Chicago.

Notable quotes:

... Both women burst into tears and hugged each other fiercely ...

... the women stood holding hands tightly as they had throughout the trial, which began Wednesday. The sisters called the city a great place. "I love Chicago," Anne Hatch said ...

... Sheehan found Anne Hatch not guilty of criminal damage to property even though she said on the stand Friday morning that she tried to kick out the window of a squad car after she was handcuffed. Hatch said she was desperately trying to help her sister, who was screaming that her arm was being broken by an officer. Asked how hard she kicked, Anne Hatch replied, "I'm a soccer player. It was a good kick."

Just gotta provide a link to this photo.

Friday, June 10, 2005

You Heard It Here First

A few weeks back, I spun this theory: The Detroit Pistons win their second consecutive NBA title. Larry Brown "retires." Weeks later, Brown is hired as the new coach of the Minnesota Timberwolves. I can't wait.

Monday, June 06, 2005


Yesterday on Radio K's Sunday Special I said that I believed that Shadow Morton produced Archie Bell & the Drells "(There's Gonna Be a) Showdown." I was wrong, that song was of course produced by Kenny Gamble and Leon Huff. Music geeks worldwide are likely disgusted with me.

Sunday, June 05, 2005

The Sunday Special

Today's the day I'll be on the radio spinning tunes - it should be tons of fun. Tune in if you get a chance. Details to the right.

Saturday, June 04, 2005

Uncle Buck Two, Starring Shawn Hatosy as Bill Tuomala

A warm welcome to the latest addition to the Tuomala family - my niece Aili Mae Jia Armstrong. My sister Sandy and her husband Greg brought her home from China today. She's a complete doll and I can tell already that even at fourteen months she's ahead of me in the smarts department. I'll be recruiting her to play on my Trivial Pursuit team in the future.

A guy from one of the other couples making the same China trip detailed his trip in his blog. Complete with photos of my sis and family and smiley Aili.

Thursday, June 02, 2005

Aside from the Corruption, the Illegal Bombing of Cambodia, and the Anti-Semitism ...

I got the creeps watching "Hardball" the other night and Andrea Mitchell read this part of the White House tapes to Chris Matthews. The "Nixon would have been a great president (if only he weren't a crook)" revisionists can chew on this one:

Nixon: “What can we do about it?”

Halderman: “If we move on him, he‘ll go out and unload everything. He knows everything that‘s to be known in the FBI. He has access to absolutely everything.”

Nixon: “What would do you with Felt?”

Halderman: “Well, I‘d ask Dean.”

Nixon: “What the hell would he do?”

Halderman: “He says you can‘t prosecute him, that he hasn‘t committed any crime. Dean‘s concerned if you let him know, he‘ll go out and go on network television.”

Nixon: “Is he a Catholic?”

Halderman says: “Jewish.”

Nixon: “Christ, put a Jew in there?”

Halderman: “Well, that could explain it, too.”

Wednesday, June 01, 2005

Deep Throat, Patriot

It was hilarious to see the weasels and crooks from the Nixon administration crawl out from under their rocks last night to appear on MSNBC and talk about the unveiling of Deep Throat. Liddy still wants to kill Dean and bragged about his plan to break into the Brookings Institution. (He claims the plan was shot down for being "too expensive.") Dean thinks Felt isn't really Deep Throat because he wrote a book about unmasking Deep Throat and Felt doesn't match his findings. Buchanan (who, to be fair, isn't a crook ... he rubs me the wrong way a lot but anybody who drank tons of whiskey with Hunter S. Thompson and chipped in with a tribute to HST in Rolling Stone isn't a weasel either) is still in deep deep love with Nixon and went so far as to call Felt "a traitor."

Whatta bunch of losers. Deep Throat is a hero who helped bring a corrupt and criminal president down. Hats off to Mark Felt.

(And ain't it great to hear the words "Deep Throat" uttered every twenty seconds on cable news?)

Tuesday, May 31, 2005

The Worst President of My Lifetime

And that's saying something, considering that crook Nixon and that moron Reagan. I'm crabby as I woke up to NPR, with Bush whining about not getting his way on a number of issues. Something about not spending taxpayers money on killing life. Shoulda thought of that before he sent 1,600 Americans to their death in a useless war. Trying to be all folksy, his attempts at wit falling way way short.

Iraq in a blood-filled chaos. Social security "reform" going nowhere. Momentum in Congress stalled, fellow godboy Frist can't get shit done. The country in big-ass debt due to the GOP's borrow-and-spend policies. If Bush weren't an inadvertent Keynesian, the economy would totally be in the tank. Four months into his second term, and he's already a lame duck.

Leaderships skills? His party is in power and he sounds like a goddamned fucking pleading momma's boy. Worst president of my lifetime.

Monday, May 30, 2005

Ten Cool Images of Sin City

Finally saw Sin City at the Riverview last night. Fucking awesome and gorgeous. I can't stop thinking about it.











Tuesday, May 24, 2005

Minnesota - Tax Free By 2010!

We won't have a sales tax, we will have a consumption fee. If you don't want to pay the fee, don't buy things.

We won't have an income tax, we will have a revenue fee. If you don't want to pay the fee, don't earn any income.

We won't have a property tax, we will have a land ownership fee. If you don't want to pay the fee, don't buy property.

("Cuz they told me, when I was younger - 'boy, you’re gonna be president'")

Monday, May 23, 2005


For a few years a quarter century ago, this man was the coolest individual on the planet.

Saturday, May 21, 2005

"Those Near and Far Wars ...

I haven't seen Episode III yet. I think I finally figured out Episode I last weekend while watching it with my brother and constantly surfing the Net for info. Episode II was delivered from Netflix yesterday - I may watch it this weekend. (Then again, with Night Shift also in my hands, Star Wars might have to wait.)

In the meantime, I'll listen to Bill Murray sing his version of the "Star Wars Theme."

Wednesday, May 18, 2005

"Ronald Reagan's Economics Represented Some of the Finer Thinking of the Eighteenth Century"

Did nothing trickle down to you in the eighties? Wondering why all those tax cuts aren't boosting the economy like they were supposed to?

Maybe then it's time to catch up with John Kenneth Galbraith. Me, I'm headed to the library tomorrow to check out one or two of his books.

Here's a great interview with Galbraith's biographer from MPR's mid-morning show last week. (Scroll down to May 10th.) I listened to it twice yesterday.

Galbraith on America's entry into South Vietnam.

William Greider on Galbraith.

All of the above is highly recommended.

Tuesday, May 17, 2005

Senator Dibble (DFL, District 60) Also Writes Back

Dear Bill,

Thank you for letting me know about your opposition to the latest proposal by Hennepin County to build a new stadium for the Twins.

I am anxious to learn more about the details so I can give it careful consideration. It is important to gauge this expenditure in light of public benefit, as we do for all public investments.

It is very interesting that the Governor and the Chamber of Commerce have no trouble with creating a new source of funding for this through the sales tax, while at the very same time they are vociferously fighting a similar proposal to create an ongoing, dedicated, reliable source of funding for transit - an investment we know has tremendous economic benefit. Meanwhile, education, healthcare, public safety, the environment, and housing all go lacking.

There may be an approach that maximizes the ability to raise public private resources by those who favor a stadium. Partial community ownership and some sources of public revenue (such as taxes on game and event tickets, event area parking, sports merchandise sales taxes, surcharge on player income taxes) are consistent with those principles.

Thanks again for getting in touch. Please continue to weigh in on this and other issues important to you.

Very truly yours,
Scott Dibble

Monday, May 16, 2005

Representative Hornstein Is My Guy

Last week I wrote my state representative and state senator to express my disapproval for the proposed increase in the Hennepin County sales tax that would help pay for a new Twins stadium. Representative Frank Hornstein (DFL, District 60B) replied to my email in under 14 hours:

Dear Bill:

Thanks for your letter. I strongly agree with you and plan to vote
against the stadium when the issue comes before the Local Government
Committee on Thursday or Friday.

I appreciated hearing from you, and please contact me if you have
further ideas, advice or concerns.

Frank Hornstein
State Representative

I see the Local Government Committee's meeting on this issue was postponed until today. Tonight I may have to take a break from my watching last week's episode of "The O.C." to see how the vote went.

Saturday, May 14, 2005

Rocky Mountain Way

This is my first-ever blog post from across state lines. I'm in the metro Denver area visiting my brother and his family. He has Schlitz in the downstairs fridge and I'm mooching all the meals, so all is cool.

The highlight of my trip out here was at the Humphrey Terminal on Thursday afternoon. I was sitting next to an Uptown cutie (wearing a hat, chicks with hot hats on rule) who was drinking White Russians. I was enjoying a tall-boy glass of Summit. The cutie announced to the bartender that she wanted to do a shot then asked he: "Are you in?" I said sure, we ended up doing something called an Upside-Down Pineapple Cake. Then she hopped on a plane to Vegas. Sigh.

Wednesday, May 11, 2005

Eleven Years of Sid's Predictions

Because, you know, a three-time repeater as division champion can't "stay competitive" without a new stadium. The below is from Paul Demko at The Blotter.

The last decade of stadium shenanigans has brought all kinds of amusing extortion schemes cooked up by the local sports moguls and their allies at the daily newspapers. At one point or another the Twins have supposedly been slated to be relocated to Salt Lake City, Portland, Las Vegas, Washington, D.C., Mexico City, Charlotte, N.C., and Choctaw, Mississippi. But no one has been more shamelessly apocalyptic in his soothsaying than that foul old goat at the Star Tribune, Sid Hartman. Here's a selection of The Great Sidoni's grandest moments of ballpark prognostication:

March 4, 1994: "One more prediction: Once the Wolves follow the North Stars out of town, it will be a lot easier for Carl Pohlad to sell the Twins for a big, big price to another city."

July 30, 1995: "My prediction is that the Twins will be gone by the year 2000 unless some major adjustments are made in their lease at the Metrodome or a new stadium is built."

January 10, 1997: "My prediction is that the Twins will be in Charlotte, N.C., by the year 2000 if a new stadium is not built. The Pohlads have put a terrific proposal on the table. And the state must do something for the Vikings. There are plenty of cities willing to give the world to get a major league franchise of any kind without getting the things that Pohlad is willing to give."

April 6, 1997: "You can write this in stone: The Twins will not be here after 1998, when Pohlad can escape his Metrodome lease, if a new stadium isn't approved during this legislative session."

May 1, 1997: "My prediction: This franchise will wind up in Mexico City in 2000 if a new stadium isn't built."

August 29, 1999: "If the St. Paul sales-tax vote is not favorable Nov. 1, then the deal is off. And if Minneapolis can't find a way to build a stadium, you might say goodbye to the Twins after the 2000 season."

December 1, 2001: "Yes, Mr. Ventura, you and you alone can save the Twins. Furthermore, I predict you will do one great job when you appear in Washington, D.C., before the House Judiciary Committee on Dec. 6. And you will have a chance to let baseball Commissioner Bud Selig know you are going to help get a stadium built in Minnesota to keep major league baseball."

March 31, 2002: "If you want my opinion, there won't be a Twins stadium without Hennepin County included and that means little likelihood of a buyer for the team. The result: This will be the last season of Major League Baseball in Minnesota."

May 2, 2005: "Believe me, if this stadium plans falls through, the Twins are done fighting for a stadium and the owners will either cut the payroll to $25 million from the present $56 million or sell the team to somebody who might move it."

Monday, May 09, 2005

And It Was 1974 or 1975 That Took the Crown

This afternoon I finally put away the CDs which have been piling up in front of my stereo since ... oh probably since Christmas. I'm extremely lazy about putting CDs away. I play 'em then generally leave 'em in the six-disc changer then when I take 'em out I put 'em in their cases and set 'em on the floor in front of the stereo rather than filing 'em away. It (inadvertently) gives my living room that slacker-music-geek look, what with all the vinyl lined up inches away in front of the TV stand.

Anyway, the by-decade breakdown of the discs I've been listening to the past four-plus months:

1950s - seven discs
1960s - eight
1970s - twenty-eight
1980s - nine
1990s - twelve
2000s - fourteen

Saturday, May 07, 2005

Mark Your Calendars

I'm pencilled in to be the guest on Radio K's Sunday Special on Sunday, June 5th. The show airs from 2 until 4 p.m. The host, DJ Terri K, told me that: "It's free form radio so you are free to bring in anything you'd like to play for 2 hours."

And she later told me that vinyl is more than welcome. Sweet!

Sunday, May 01, 2005

"A contender if not now then tomorrow for the title Best Writer in America."

In an effort to stem the tide of bad luck and bad news that has plagued me the past several weeks (car stereo stolen, car failure, multiple bike flat tires, friend moving out of town, loss of accounting client, scramble to make April 15th estimated tax payment, cash-strapped, slow go on my kinda-secret big-ass writing project, etc. etc.), I realized that only a grand gesture could turn my frown upside down.

Hence the First Annual Lester Bangs Lyndale Bar Crawl. About 4:30 yesterday afternoon – Bangs (my favorite writer ever) died on April 30th, 1982 – I hopped on a bus destined for Lyndale and Franklin armed only with some cash and a copy of Psychotic Reactions and Carburetor Dung (my favorite book ever.) The plan was to work my southward (and homeward) with a stop for a beer and Bangs-reading at a half-dozen or so bars. The day was perfect for this – cloudy and cool with little chance of breaking out in a sweat or being tempted to sit outside. This was definitely a day to cozy up indoors with a cold one and a book.

The readings were (the order is approximate, due to a last-second jacket change I left my pen and notepad at home – probably for the best, this was to be a crawl of reading and not writing):

"The Guess Who: Live at the Paramount"
"Peter Laughner"
"Thinking the Unthinkable About John Lennon"
"My Night of Ecstasy with the J. Geils Band"
"Slade: Sladest"
"Review of Peter Guralnick's Lost Highway: Journeys & Arrivals of American Musicians"
"Black Oak Arkansas: Keep the Faith"
"Chicago at Carnegie Hall, Volumes I, II, III & IV"
"Richard Hell: Death Means Never Having to Say You're Incomplete"
"White Witch"
"from Notes on PIL's Metal Box"
"The Greatest Album Ever Made"
"New Year's Eve"
"Jethro Tull in Vietnam"

The bars were:

Mortimer's – I knew the crawl was going to be a good one when I ordered a Premium tap and the bartender said it was two-for-ones. "You're stuck here until six," he said. That was not to be the case.

Red Dragon – The bartender here was a tall tall tall blonde who was quite funny. I contemplated writing a poem on the spot titled "Ode to the Daytime Bartender." It was the last day of National Poetry Month, after all, and I had no poems to show for it this year.

I entered the Leaning Tower of Pizza and was kinda relieved to see all the seats at the bar was full. The last time I had been in this place was a few years ago where I sat in the restaurant for ten minutes, was never served or approached by the wait staff, and left. Why I re-entered this place, I don't know.

Bulldog – I had never been here but was greeted by the bartender like I was Norm Peterson. Damn, it's May now but I should still write that poem! I didn't get much reading here as the guy who was seated next to me was talkative. He was supposed to have his daughter this afternoon but had a couple of beers here and called his ex-wife and said he had a migraine. Then he commenced to drinking some more. He told me this before he tried to set me up with his ex. "She's beautiful, so beautiful," he said.

CC Club – Oh, how the mighty have fallen. This used to be my #1 bar, but this was probably the third time I've been here in the past year. Got some solid reading done here.

I tried to enter the VFW – I had also never been here also – but ran into a door that said "Members Only." That was probably for the best, as I don't feel comfortable being in VFWs unless I'm with someone a generation or two ahead of me, and preferably someone who's been in the service.

Herkimer – Also got some great reading done here, despite the eye candy distractions.

Country Bar – Ah, the Country Bar. I looked forward to having a Grain Belt bottle (a beer which had escaped me during the crawl) and reading "Jethro Tull in Vietnam" on this, the 30th anniversary of the fall of Saigon. After getting quizzed from the regulars about my book (they all professed to have first-hand knowledge of psychotic reactions.) I ordered a beer from my favorite gal and took a seat at a back table. Tuomala, I thought, this bar crawl has been awesome – it's time to celebrate. I asked the bartender if she wanted to do a shot with me. She immediately said "yes" and said she'd bring the shots out to me. She did so and gave me a discount. I tipped her well and buried myself in the Bangs:

In "Jethro Tull in Vietnam," Bangs discovers that Jethro Tull sounds exactly like some Vietnamese folk music he has heard. He fantasizes (but doesn't write it as such) about flying to Saigon to ask South Vietnam's President Thieu about this resemblance. Thieu listens to some of Tull's Thick as a Brick and then speaks:

"It has always amazed me how you Americans can feed yourself the worst kind of garbage and still survive, but now at last I think I understand. I don't like Jethro Tull either – I never have, not even when all my friends were bending my ear with This Was – but not, perhaps, for the same reasons which have driven you to such extremes.

"I don't like them because you are right. They do sound like Vietnamese folk music, and
I'm no folkie!"

Awesome stuff. I ordered one last beer and my gal, without prompting, brought out two more shots for us. Compliments of her. Sigh.

The walk home damn near was a crawl. I woke up this afternoon with a huge grin. God bless you Lester Bangs. The Lord be with you, daytime bartenders.

Wednesday, April 27, 2005

How Does The Star Tribune Feel About The New Proposed Twins Stadium Deal?

First of all, you can find links to email your Hennepin County Commissioner here.

Now to the Strib ...

Editorial: Twins & Hennepin/A win for Pawlenty, too

A story on how the scrappy front office of the Twins mirrors their scrappy efforts on the field. I swear late last night this story's headline online was something like "Twins Need Stadium Money" or something such.

A story to let you know that it very rarely snows June through September in Minneapolis.

A story on how the tax wouldn't really cost you that much; with no mention of how if Carl Pohlad were to pay for the total cost of a stadium, it wouldn't cost him that much.

Jim Souhan: Finally a stadium plan that sounds reasonable. Souhan pens these sunny words:

Yes, this is a great deal for Pohlad, but that's the way the world works -- rich people make good deals for themselves, whether they own sports teams or computer companies.

The rich will always get richer, with or without our help.

Do those words sound familiar? Maybe you've been listening to Creedence Clearwater Revival lately:

Saw the people standin' thousand years in chains.
Somebody said it's diff'rent now, look, it's just the same.
Pharoahs spin the message, round and round the truth.
They could have saved a million people, How can I tell you?

Tuesday, April 26, 2005


Let It Be Records is closing. (news via Migwire via LIB's newsletter)

I have fond memories of spending time at Let It Be after work, during lunch break, or when stressed out from my job a block away. I haven't gone there much in the past few years, due to not working downtown any more.

Which reminds me - Roadrunner Records' spring sale starts tomorrow and runs through Sunday. 15% off new stuff, 20% off used.

Friday, April 22, 2005

Do I Have A Cardboard Sign On My Boulevard That Says "Free"??

Geez, first Esquire rips me off and now Christgau reiterates something from issue #39 AND knicks my essay's title!

Thursday, April 21, 2005

Fun With Math

Just like last year, my (would-be?) scientific calculations have determined the Top Ten College Hockey Programs Of All Time:

1 - Michigan (4034 points)
2 - North Dakota (3480)
3 - Denver (3122)
4 - Minnesota (3078)
5 - Boston University (2541)
6 - Wisconsin (2283)
7 - Boston College (1644)
8 - Michigan Tech (1585)
9 - Maine (1473)
10 - Lake Superior State (1329)

The only change in the rankings from last year is that Denver moves past Minnesota into third.

The calculations used were as follows:

1) Making it only to the NCAA semifinals and not to the title game gives points as follows: 1 point for 1948 semifinalists, 2 points for 1949 semifinalist, 3 points for 1950 semifinalists, and so on through 2005. More points are assigned the closer we get to the present under the What Have You Done For Me Lately Theorem.

2) Finishing second in the NCAAs gives points as follows: 116 points for 1948 runners-up, 117 points for 1949 runners-up, 118 points for 1950 runners-up, and so on through 2005. 116 points is given to the 1948 runners-up under the reasoning that finishing second is twice as great as being a semifinalist in 2005 (58 points.) The What Have You Done For Me Lately Theorem also applies here.

3) Winning the NCAA championship gives points as follows: 346 points for 1948 champions, 347 points for 1949 champions, 348 points for 1950 champions, and so on through 2005. 346 points is given to the 1948 champions under the reasoning that winning it all is twice as great as finishing second in 2005 (173 points.) The What Have You Done For Me Lately Theorem also applies here.

The Excel file I used to make these calculations is available for download here. Please feel free to comment or email me with comments or criticisms on my calculation process.

Tuesday, April 19, 2005


The elect-the-pope stuff is kinda cool to keep an eye on - what with all the secrecy, mystery, and the black smoke / white smoke effect. But nothing beats the good old days, when there was for a while two - and then three - competing popes:

In 1378, the cardinals elected Pope Urban VI. He was not a good choice.

"I can do anything, absolutely anything I like," Urban proclaimed. This self-ordained license apparently included the torture and murder of six cardinals who dared to defy him.

Realizing they had a complete maniac on their hands, the remaining cardinals elected a new pope who promptly moved to France. Urban had no intention of budging from his throne in Rome, however. Instead, he appointed his own cardinals and ruled from there.

Now there were two duly elected popes and two colleges of cardinals -- one in France, one in Italy. It was a mess doomed to get even messier. Each side kept picking its own pope whenever a vacancy opened until finally the two conclaves of cardinals united and elected Alexander V in 1409. Only hitch was, neither of the old popes was willing to step down.

Now, with three popes on the job ...

Update: The cardinals just elected a 78-year old to be pope. Sorry, I laughed out loud. I had a dream last night where they elected a 95-year old dude.

Monday, April 18, 2005

Phil Who?

UND nabs Jonathan Toews.

Toews, who had 44 goals and 57 assists in 58 games this season as the Sabres won the national midget championship, will enroll at UND this fall.

Toews, who speaks fluent French and who turns 17 later this month, accelerated his schooling at Shattuck to graduate a year early. "That he completed three years of high school in two years shows his dedication and commitment," Hakstol said.

Toews is regarded as a big-time talent.

"He brings so much to the table," Hakstol said. "He has a chance to be a great power forward at this level. He has good hands, good vision and a pure goal-scoring knack. He's just a well-rounded player."

Friday, April 15, 2005

At The Bar The Other Night
Did I Mention It's The Greatest Thing Ever Made For Television?

There is no better fuck-you to insomnia than going nuclear, or as I like to call it: The Vodka Solution. Sure, the doctor gave me some healthy Pavlovian solutions that work, but those may take half the night. And there is always sleeping pills, but they kill me for two days at least.

I got the coffee ready to go for the next morning and I could get a little extra shut-eye as it would be Writing Day and with my computer in the shop, all I really had to do on my list was to head to the library for research on Sorta Secret Project #1 and then return home to read some Hunter S. Thompson and then do some menial work on Sorta Secret Project #2. So I hopped on my bike and headed down the street to the bar for some cheap vodka and Premiums.

It was a nice night to medidate at the bar as no one was inclined to talk to me except for the bartender and waitress. I drifted off into an utter state of relaxation. Towards closing, I saw a guy I had talked to last winter. Then we had talked about sports and the conversation somehow ended with him telling me that I had to, just had to see "Band of Brothers." I told him I meant to, that my brother had been telling me the same thing for months. But this guy's testimony - something about him and his dad being really moved while watching it together - set me in motion to finally moving the miniseries to the top of my Netflix queue.

I walked up to the guy, re-introduced myself, blurted out something about how he had pushed me towards "Band of Brothers", and that it was the greatest thing ever made for television. We immediately leaped into a conversation about the series. As the bar folks encouraged us to leave, we recalled the episode where Easy Company discovers a concentration camp but weren't sure what it was at first. Maybe it was the smoke (nice try Tuomala, there's a smoking ban in effect in your fine city), but I think we damn near teared up while discussing that episode. We parted ways before the staff got mad at us.

Upon my return home I was strangely thankful I didn't own "Band of Brothers" on DVD - I could easily see myself watching it until the dawn's early light. I slept well that night after going nuclear.

Wednesday, April 13, 2005


My iMac is in the shop getting a new disk drive installed - it was refusing to play many of the discs in my music collection. Access to the web and email is limited. Not only am I getting a ton of reading done, but my neck and shoulders feel wonderful. Hey First Tech - keep that Mac through the weekend if need be.

Sunday, April 10, 2005

Cool Stuff

Mary Lucia interviews Greil Marcus on The Current. Scroll down to the features section.

Saturday, April 09, 2005


Congratulations to the Denver University Pioneers on their 4-1 win over the North Dakota Fighting Sioux tonight. The Pioneers played better and better as the game went on, their d-men were outstanding, and their goalie Peter Mannino was nearly unbeatable.

Denver moves into a second-place tie with North Dakota with seven titles all-time.

Sioux coach Dave Hakstol did not become the first rookie coach to win a national title. I am reminded of one Gino Gasparini, who lost in the title game his first year and then came back the next year and won it all.

Road greens or home whites in the 2006 championship game?
It's Only Fitting

My Denver-based brother and I have been trash talking via email about tonight's game. Worse, we've been copying our sister and parents on the thread. But I'm going to clean it up for the blog.

It's fitting that Denver University and the University of North Dakota are squaring off in tonight's championship game. Hardware-wise, these are historically the top two programs in the WCHA. The numbers:

1) National championships - UND #1 with seven, DU #2 with six.

2) Regular season championships - UND #1 with twelve, DU #2 with ten.

The two teams have a at-times nasty rivalry that dates back to the fifties. This is the fourth time that they have met in the title game, with DU winning in 1958 and 1968 and UND winning in 1959. (I'm still heartbroken about that '68 game ...)

My stab at an analyis:

1) Why DU will win - Peter Mannino is playing outstanding in goal, are the defending national champions, are 3-0 against UND this season, power-play was awesome in the semifinal game, they play better and better as the games go on, Gabe Gauthier.

2) Why UND will win - Jordan Parise is playing outstanding in goal, they took DU to overtime in the WCHA semifinals on short rest and with their #2 goalie, they will win the physical battles, the Bina factor.

This could be a classic ending to the WCHA invitational. I have no bets on tonight's game - I'm still riding high with winning a case of Summit Pale Ale on Thursday's game.

Friday, April 08, 2005

That Spin Ain't Working

No team shows up at a Frozen Four semifinal and plays flat. If you want to keep saying that the Gophers played flat, just acknowledge that it was because the Sioux flattened them early and often.

Thursday, April 07, 2005

Road Greens

A big f*ck all y'all to those of you who have been laughing at me since Dave Hakstol's hire at UND. I kept saying (in a nod to Dan "The Common Man" Cole): "Will the Fighting Sioux be wearing home whites or road greens in the NCAA title game?"

It's gonna be ROAD GREENS.
Has Judd Stevens Found His Wallet Yet?

Oh man the Fighting Sioux totally dominated the Gophers tonight and won 4-2 ... the same score I predicted in a bet with my good friend Turk, who will soon be delivering a case of Summit Pale Ale to my door.

The Gophers scored two goals on a four-minute power play, but before that they had given up a short-handed goal on the same power play. This was a "character" game - the Sioux showed plenty of character from the gitgo, coming out and hitting the Gophers and firing shots on goal; while the Gophers seemed caught in the headlights.

The game announcers talked about the Gophers talent, but there was no shortage of talent on the Sioux side: Aside from their punishing and smart defensemen, they had guys like fourth-liner Erik Fabian and froshie Travis Zajac lighting up the red light.

The Sioux move on to play Denver. This will be a classic. After Minnesota, the Sioux hate Denver the second-most in a rivalry that dates back to the fifties. The teams have played each other three times in the title game, with Denver winning two. If Denver wins, they pull into a tie with national titles with the Sioux with seven total. (Michigan leads with nine.) If the Sioux win, they stay at second with a total with eight.

The Sioux will be in the title game for a record twelfth time. Their record in the title games is 7-4. Denver's record is 6-2.

(Any Gopher fans who are wondering ... the Gophers' record in title games is 5-6. )
ESPN Slurps The Sioux

Earlier today on the Deuce, Barry Melrose (come back man, I love ya ...) said: "If you haven't seen North Dakota play this season, they are the most physical team in college hockey. They will pound Minnesota for three periods."

Just now on "Pardon the Interruption" (maybe my favorite show on the tube right now even over "Arrested Development"):

Tony: "The Frozen Four is going on. Who ya got?"

Wilbon: "Denver already won earlier today. Tonight I got North Dakota over Minnesota."
I Wanna See Someone Throw A Dead Gopher On The Ice After A Sioux Goal

My Sioux are playing the hated Gophers tonight. It's an all-WCHA Frozen Four with rivals Colorado College and Denver University playing (DU ended up winning 6-2) as I type. And I posted a tasteless pontiff photo. Classy guy.

Random notes -

* Don Lucia said he'd rather play the Sioux on Lake Superior than a regulation-size rink. Considering Ohio's history of rink management in the Frozen Four (anybody remember all that melted ice in '96?), that might not be a bad idea.

* On ESPN, they showed a scalper who looked eerily like Donald Rumsfeld trying to sell tickets to a Sioux fan.

* Watching Barry Melrose try to explain the WCHA's dominance is funny. Oh, and drop the pinstripe suits Barry.

* I want UM's Derek Peltier to draw a penalty tonight, just so I can yell "Free Peltier!"

The Pope just recently died? I thought that dude from Monster Magnet got him as part of the greatest album packaging ever, for Powertrip.

Wednesday, April 06, 2005

More On Automatic Transmission (Non-)Driving

My pal Jeff compared my rental automatic-transmission car to a go-cart. Though I think he said that because it is a Ford Focus.

I realized that driving a car with automatic transmission vs. manual transmission is like waterskiing on two Dick Pope Jr. skiis vs. an EP slalom. The Dick Popes are slippery, with less control, and not nearly as much fun as the EP.

I get my car back tomorrow. Whew.

Tuesday, April 05, 2005

United States Reigns Supreme In Urban-Legend-Busting Websites

According to the ever-reliable, John Cleese did not pen the "Revocation of America's Independence" piece that I ranted on here and here.

Yes, I will pat myself on the back for doubting Cleese's authorship in both of my posts.

Monday, April 04, 2005

Unsafe At Any Speed

This morning I dropped my car off at the shop, where it will be for most of the week. I got a rental car, it has automatic transmission. I hate automatic transmission. My left foot is bored as it is inactive, my right hand is bored as it doesn't get to shift ... all it does is steer. Taking curves and turning corners is no fun. There's no downshifting for fantasy race car driver experiences. It feels totally awkward - like I'm not in complete control of the driving.

Dammit! I should have declined the rental car, saved the money, and taken public transportation where I could then catch up on my reading.

Friday, April 01, 2005

Soon To Open In South Minneapolis

"Hi, is this the school for strippers? Sorry ... I mean: Is this the school for dancers? Great! Thanks ... hey, I have as question ... would it be possible for me to audit a class or two ... hello? ... hello? ..."

Thursday, March 31, 2005

Mitch Hedberg, RIP

My good friend Joel just called me with the news. He had turned me on to Hedberg's humor and we saw him perform a couple of times in the Twin Cities. The first time was in St. Paul, where Hedberg riffed away with jokes while a dude played jazz lines on a stand-up bass. We were exhausted from laughing by the time the show was over. 37 is way too young. Rest in peace, Mitch.

You can check out some of Mitch's material here.

Joel checks in with a memory: I think the best show I ever saw was the one with you at Fitzgerald theater. He had the bass player in the background. His timing/rhythm was just incredible. It was amazing how he would build up the laughs to a point where he could say anything and you would bust a gut laughing. "I can't wait until the show is over. I have a roll of lifesavers in my pocket, and the next one is pineapple."

Wednesday, March 30, 2005

A Picture Says A Thousand Words

Or in this case, three beautiful ones. Thanks to Chuck for the linkage.

Update: Robbie sent a version of the sign with alternate wording.

Tuesday, March 29, 2005

Give 'Em Hell, Heitkamp

A North Dakota state senator is sponsoring a resolution to ask MLB to reinstate Roger Maris's home run record. I don't think the North Dakota legislature has much sway, but it'll be interesting to see how that weenie Bud Selig responds to this.

Sunday, March 27, 2005

The WCHA Invitational

This year I am calling the NCAA Frozen Four "The WCHA Invitational." All four teams in the national semifinals - Colorado College, North Dakota, Denver University, and Minnesota - are from college hockey's greatest conference, the WCHA.

The North Dakota Fighting Sioux will be facing off against hated rival Minnesota Golden Gophers in one of the semifinal games. The other will feature hated rivals Colorado College and Denver University. This is going to be so f**king awesome!

My team, the Sioux, trounced all over Boston University (4-0) and #1-nationally-ranked Boston College (6-3) over the weekend to earn a trip to The WCHA Invitational. And the games were in Worcester, Mass. In your face, Hockey Least!

CC knocked off Michigan in the state of Michigan. Denver knocked off New Hampshire in Amherst, Mass. Minnesota stayed in their home rink and their scoring outage continued, but they gutted out a couple of overtime wins. I thought Cornell was going to pull the upset this afternoon, but one of their players kept trying to freeze the puck in his own zone. He didn't get a whistle, but kept trying to freeze the puck. The Gopher forwards made him pay. See ya later EZAC!

Now I'm off to daydream about making "WCHA Invitational" teeshirts to sell online. This is the surest money-making scheme since Robbie Halvorson's idea to put a Red Pepper stand in the Xcel for the WCHA Final Five.

Thursday, March 24, 2005

Eight Games On TV This Weekend

I am once again matching up with The Elder from Fraters Libertas in a college hockey playoffs pick 'em match. He will match his actually-goes-to-games (and plays-the-game) prowess against my futon-potato street smarts. I am getting in shape for Saturday, when on Fox Sports North there is four games broadcasting between 11:00 am and approximately 9:30 pm.


Boston College 6
Mercyhurst 1

North Dakota 3
Boston University 2

Boston College 4
North Dakota 2


Cornell 4
Ohio State 3

Maine 3
Minnesota 1

Maine 4
Cornell 3


Colorado College 4
Colgate 2

Michigan 5
Wisconsin 2

Michigan 4
Colorado College 2


Harvard 2
New Hamphsire 1

Denver 6
Bemidji State 2

Denver 5
Harvard 2


Boston College 3
Maine 1

Denver 3
Michigan 2

Denver 2
Boston College 1

Honestly, I haven't seen many teams outside of the WCHA for an extended period of time this season. Michigan looked tough for the bit I saw them last weekend. I keep thinking that Colorado College is the best team I've seen, but Denver keeps finding ways to win. I'm going with them. So not only will Denver win back-to-back national titles, they win their seventh title, moving into a tie with North Dakota for #2 in titles behind Michigan with nine.

Wednesday, March 23, 2005

Those Animal Doctors Are Sooooo Above-It-All

I have an appointment tomorrow afternoon to take my cat to the vet for her yearly check-up. I called the vet's office to see if maybe I could just drop off a videotape of her in action and they could call me back with a diagnosis. I'm not sure, but I think the receptionist was stifling laughter.

Monday, March 21, 2005

I'll Take 2-1 and 1-0 Over 7-6 and 5-4

It's hilarious to read and hear some Gopher fans describe the Denver University 1-0 win over Colorado College in the WCHA Final Five championship game as akin to a boring NHL game.

It was two heated rivals who tied for the conference regular season title playing in what I termed an "instant classic" while watching it. But Gopher fans are moaning about it and saying they prefer more scoring and a more wide-open game.

Then again - 1) when your team only scores two goals in two games, and 2) they get pounded physically by a team that by all means should have been drained while playing their third game in three days; I can see why you yearn for goals and lots of oh-gee tic-tac-toe passing. But hey - Tyler Hirsch was a hoot!

Sunday, March 20, 2005

Plagiarism: The Highest Form Of Flattery

Tell me - Does this feature in Esquire eerily resemble something I came up with four years ago?

Wednesday, March 16, 2005


While wearing a Team Finland hockey jersey (hi Stanton), we celebrate the last minutes of St. Urho's Day with a shot of Finlandia and Hanoi Rocks' "Self Destruction Blues" on the boombox. Tomorrow those amateurs the Irish have their day. Make it a point to stay out of Brit's Pub.

Monday, March 14, 2005

Sunday, March 13, 2005

More Than You Want To Know

Migwire wants to know who we share our birthdays with. Mine, August 14th, is the Unofficial Hot Babe Birthday:

Mila Kunis
Catherine Bell
Halle Berry
My friend Andrea, who I don't have a picture of to post and if I did her husband would kick my ass

I also share a birthday with:

Steve Martin
Magic Johnson
John Brodie
David Crosby
Larry Graham
Doc Holliday
Gary Larson (The Far Side)
Earl Weaver
My cousin Michael
My parents' neighbors' son Jake

August 14th was also V-J day in 1945.

Friday, March 11, 2005

Your Maintenance Request Has Been Received ...

A couple of folks have emailed me to say that my comments posting function isn't working. I was able to post a couple of comments today, but maybe it works for me because I "own" this blog. I checked all of my settings and republished in hopes that it would clear this up. As some of you may know, the Blogger help section is a little awkward so I'll try fixing this on my own for now.

Please keep trying to comment or feel free to email me with your comments as well. Thanks for reading and have a great weekend.

Thursday, March 10, 2005

More For "Cleese"

(More rambling on this post.)

Hey JC - You think your little podunk country is superior to the USA? Okay, just try getting along with all the things we Americans have brought you:

1) You longer have the luxury of automobiles or similarly-powered vehicles such as buses. (Hey! There goes your "petrol" problem!)

2) You Brits must give up these communications devices: Telephones, telegraphs, and radios.

2) You must surrender your personal computers. You cannot travel elsewhere and then surf the Internet.

3) You may no longer watch TVs or movies.

4) You may no longer listen to: rock 'n' roll, blues, country, western, R&B, soul, hip-hop, jazz, or gospel.

5) Goodbye to whatever form of representative democracy you now have ... hello inbred, German fossil Queen Elizabeth II as your ruler.

Have fun and write when your country becomes relevant again. I have the feeling this new century could be your good-luck charm!!
Where's Batman When You Need Him?

I went out to my car tonight to find out that my driver's side lock was busted and my stereo and cell phone were taken. (The phone sits unused in my glove compartment until I remember to throw it into my bookbag.)

After rushing to the liquor store for a box of Schlitz to help console me, I returned home and went online to look at my cell phone activity. The stupid fucker or fuckers had used my phone to call numbers in Blaine and Anoka. I called my cell phone service and suspended my account until I get a new phone. Then I printed off the online detail and drove it over to the 5th Precint HQ pronto, figuring I had the evidence in hand to break this case wide open.

I was hoping to be escorted to the desk of a wise-cracking Minneapolis version of Lennie Brisco, who would commend me for my amateur-yet-effective gumshoe work. But the officer behind the desk dismissed my evidence as not being able to help - he said if they called the numbers, the call-receivers would just claim the criminals had called the wrong number. Then he gave me an automated phone number to call to report my incident. He was a nice guy; but at least he could have faked it, taken my printout, said it was a "good lead," and then laughed about it with the boys at Dulono's when his shift was over.

What is truly going to suck is being without a car radio or CD player until I get things sorted out with my insurance people. So if you're in South Minneapolis and you hear a man in a black Chevy Cavalier singing Van Halen tunes to himself, please honk and wave hi.

Wednesday, March 09, 2005

Chuck Klosterman In The March Issue Of Esquire

"By early 2005, every American had a blog. These blogs evolved into an incendiary form of 'new journalism' that aggresively covered previously unreported issues. These issues included the growth of the blogosphere, the future of blogging, blogging's relationship to the other media, what blogging reflected about society, the unblogged lifestyles of certain blogging celebrities, why the mainstream media refused to recognize blogging as a legitimate news source, and potential cast changes on The O.C. It was an exhilirating time for anyone who knew how to type."

Tuesday, March 08, 2005

Tuomala To Brit - Don't Tread On Me

Today someone emailed me a message that was allegedly from John Cleese. It was an attempt at humor, that stated how the UK was "revoking" our independence. However - our independence was fought for, not granted. I remain unimpressed with the UK - hey go invent your own popular music genres for once, if you are able.

Here is the "Cleese" message, down below are my responses:

Message from John Cleese
To the citizens of the United States of America:

In light of your failure to elect a competent President of the USA and thus to govern yourselves, we hereby give notice of the revocation of your independence, effective immediately. Her Sovereign Majesty Queen Elizabeth II will resume monarchical duties over all states, commonwealths and other territories (excepting Kansas, which she does not fancy). Your new prime minister, Tony Blair, will appoint a governor for America without the need for further elections. Congress and the Senate will be disbanded. A questionnaire may be circulated next year to determine whether any of you noticed.

To aid in the transition to a British Crown Dependency, the following rules are introduced with immediate effect:

1. You should look up "revocation" in the Oxford English Dictionary. Then look up "aluminium," and check the pronunciation guide. You will be amazed at just how wrongly you have been pronouncing it. The letter 'U' will be reinstated in words such as 'colour', 'favour' and 'neighbour.' Likewise, you will learn to spell 'doughnut' without skipping half the letters, and the suffix "ize" will be replaced by the suffix "ise." You will learn that the suffix 'burgh' is pronounced 'burra'; you may elect to respell Pittsburgh as 'Pittsberg' if you find you simply can't cope with correct pronunciation. Generally, you will be expected to raise your vocabulary to acceptable levels (look up "vocabulary"). Using the same twenty-seven words interspersed with filler noises such as "like" and "you know" is an unacceptable and inefficient form of communication.

2. There is no such thing as "US English." We will let Microsoft know on your behalf. The Microsoft spell-checker will be adjusted to take account of the reinstated letter 'u' and the elimination of "-ize."

3. You will relearn your original national anthem, "God Save The Queen", but only after fully carrying out Task #1 (see above).

4. July 4th will no longer be celebrated as a holiday. November 2nd will be a new national holiday, but to be celebrated only in England. It will be called "Come-Uppance Day."

5. You will learn to resolve personal issues without using guns, lawyers or therapists. The fact that you need so many lawyers and therapists shows that you're not adult enough to be independent. Guns should only be handled by adults. If you're not adult enough to sort things out without suing someone or speaking to a therapist then you're not grown up enough to handle a gun. Therefore, you will no longer be allowed to own or carry anything more dangerous than a vegetable peeler. A permit will be required if you wish to carry a vegetable peeler in public.

6. All American cars are hereby banned. They are crap and this is for your own good. When we show you German cars, you will understand what we mean. All intersections will be replaced with roundabouts, and you will start driving on the left with immediate effect. At the same time, you will go metric with immediate effect and without the benefit of conversion tables. Both roundabouts and metrication will help you understand the British sense of humour.

7. The Former USA will adopt UK prices on petrol (which you have been calling "gasoline")-roughly $6/US gallon. Get used to it.

8. You will learn to make real chips. Those things you call French fries are not real chips, and those things you insist on calling potato chips are properly called "crisps." Real chips are thick cut, fried in animal fat, and dressed not with mayonnaise but with vinegar.

9. Waiters and waitresses will be trained to be more aggressive with customers.

10. The cold tasteless stuff you insist on calling beer is not actually beer at all. Henceforth, only proper British Bitter will be referred to as "beer," and European brews of known and accepted provenance will be referred to as "Lager." American brands will be referred to as "Near-Frozen Gnat's Urine," so that all can be sold without risk of further confusion.

11. Hollywood will be required occasionally to cast English actors as good guys. Hollywood will also be required to cast English actors to play English characters. Watching Andie MacDowell attempt English dialogue in "Four Weddings and a Funeral" was an experience akin to having one's ears removed with a cheese grater.

12. You will cease playing American "football." There is only one kind of proper football; you call it "soccer." Those of you brave enough will, in time, will be allowed to play rugby (which has some similarities to American "football", but does not involve stopping for a rest every twenty seconds or wearing full kevlar body armour like a bunch of nancies). Further, you will stop playing baseball. It is not reasonable to host an event called the "World Series" for a game which is not played outside of America. Since only 2.1% of you are aware that there is a world beyond your borders, your error is understandable.

13. You must tell us who killed JFK. It's been driving us mad.

14. An internal revenue agent (i.e. tax collector) from Her Majesty's Government will be with you shortly to ensure the acquisition of all monies due (backdated to 1776).

Thank you for your co-operation and have a great day.

#1 If you guys are so goddamned smart, why don't you still rule the world? We talk the way we wanna talk. When we say "jump", Tony Blair understands totally and completely. If it weren't for us, you'd be speaking German which your royalty probably does anyway because THEY ARE ALL FUCKING GERMANS.

#3 We will do this once you beat us in a war.

#4 My six-pack of Colt .45 next July 4th is dedicated to you, you I-was-funny-thirty-years ago madman!

#5 I wish Hunter S. Thompson were still here to blow your brains out.

#6 "Union-made on American soil." Now I want to blow your brains out.

#8 We are not Canadian, we are American. It's called ketchup. Don't lecture us on cuisine - please - there is no demand for British entrees here in the USA.

#10 This car is powered by Schlitz. No matter how much I drink, your women don't look better.

#11 It was called "Band of Brothers." Okay, it wasn't quite Hollywood, but it allowed British actors to portray American soldiers winning World War II. For the British. You're welcome.

#12 I remember being in Brit's Pub with a soccer game on the tube. The score was, amazingly, 0-0. I kept thinking "OMIGOD! THIS GAME IS ABOUT TO BUST WIDE OPEN!" The real world is the six hockey-playing powers: USA, Canada, Russia, Czech Republic, Finland, Sweden. All other countries are third world. Soccer is for children. Grow up already.

#14 Okay. But first we'll bomb the shit out of you like Germany would have if it wouldn't have been for us. (Twice.)

Extra credit: Cleese - been in anything that anyone has seen lately?

Monday, March 07, 2005

Back To The Notebook

Writing produces a thrill. In my notebook, various spoken or email dialogues woven with pages, thoughts, etc. written in the notebook over coffee or beer point me toward a subject or a loosely-formed rambling. Typing said notes into pages, many times thinking of more words, sentences, paragraphs to add. Printing off the page and going through it with a red pen, adding more, deleting some, figuring out the order/outline of the piece. Repeating this process however many times it takes, adding the latest revision onto the stack of revisions that are clipped together - the stack is sometimes used to refer to earlier drafts for wordings, but mostly used so when you're all done you have a visual reminder of your effort. Think of a title. Have some semblence of a draft that may or may not be complete. Read it aloud. Reword or rewrite words, sentences, paragraphs that don't sound correct or have awkward rhythms. Repeat this process as many times as it takes until the piece is complete. Run spell check, eliminate any double spaces. Print, write DONE at the top. Smile or smirk.

Saturday, March 05, 2005

Best Punk Album Ever?

Just got done tracking the New York Dolls' Too Much Too Soon album on headphones in the dark. The disc is way too much fun, produced by Shadow Morton - the man who brought you the great Shangri-Las ... who the Beatles "saved" you from even though the Shangri-Las were much sexier, tougher, and in-a-good-way weirder.

On this album, the Dolls add to their stew of guitar/trampy blasts a bunch of rock 'n' roll throwback moments - "Stranded in the Jungle" (The Cadets), "There's Gonna Be A Showdown" (Archie Bell & The Drells), "Bad Detective"(The Coasters), and "Don't You Start Me Talkin'" (Sonny Boy Williamson.) Songs feature female backing vocals, woo-hoos, honking sax, and a general sense of what's-next anarchy.

But now I'm typing and thinking too much: Did punk peak before it happened (1976-on)? New York Dolls, Stooges, MC5, the original Alice Cooper band, all the punk/garage-bands of the sixties ... Standells, The Count Five, Chocolate Watchband, Paul Revere & the Raiders, The Seeds, etc.

Guess I'll try not to think too much. It's Saturday night. Best to go and blast the Doll's first album (or at least Shangri-Las quoting "Looking For A Kiss", when I say I'm in love you best believe I'm in love L-U-V) and have a Schlitz as a nod to its cover. (bottom right center!)