Tuesday, June 10, 2014
The Standells - "Try It"
(Early draft of a personal ad - do they still have these? Back section of City Pages? - written to get the attention of a certain young lady.)
To the punk rock girl dressed in black shoes, black shorts, black top, with dreds and sunglasses outside of Extreme Noise Records on Lake Street May 28th around 7:15 pm who aimed a huge smile my way as I was unlocking my bike:
Hey Killer Smile - I merely smiled back at you that evening. Here's what I should have come out and said -
I got eighteen beers - Six Summit EPAs and a twelver of Premium, all in cans - in this rear bike basket. I got some great punk rock albums ready to play on my Technics sound system: The Very Best of The Standells on the Hip-O label and Paul Revere and the Raiders' Greatest Hits on the well-respected Columbia label. (And if you plan on staying longer, I got the Nuggets and Children of Nuggets box sets.) You can simply hop on these handlebars and we'll take the six blocks home. I can wear all black also (black Nikes, black gym shorts, black Cheap Trick teeshirt.) I don't have cool sunglasses like you, but I do have transition lenses so I can block out the sun pretty quick when need be (which is almost always, right?); these kinda-shades look especially great on me in the winter when I'm also sporting my long-sleeve black-and-gray Led Zep teeshirt ("Communication Breakdown" = punk rock riff?) and UND hockey hat pulled low … and for further street cred my favorite sports team, said UND hockey squad, sometimes also dresses in all black.
As you can see from the above, my punk rock credentials are pretty darn good. I should also mention that I once shook Wayne Kramer's hand. And that when I was a toddler, I stabbed myself in the head with a blue pencil and still have a blue dot to prove it. I've even been in Extreme Noise once or twice. I "get" punk rock. So let's splurge, buy the Los Nuggetz box set, and spend the summer together with it and discounted Tecate in cans.