"Chicago Is A Tough Guy Town"

Why it's refreshing to have a president from the Upper Midwest rather than Texas, California, or the South.

Parting Shots

On Inauguration Day, the Common Man read my email that listed all the things that Dubya accomplished while president.

It's even more enjoyable if you are familiar with Kevin McHale's Big Man Camp.

New Day Rising

An amazing, historic day on Tuesday. As President Obama began to speak, I said: "Gonna need some coffee for this one" and ran into the kitchen to pour a cup. Great speech.

In reaffirming the greatness of our nation, we understand that greatness is never a given. It must be earned. Our journey has never been one of shortcuts or settling for less. It has not been the path for the faint-hearted — for those who prefer leisure over work, or seek only the pleasures of riches and fame. Rather, it has been the risk-takers, the doers, the makers of things — some celebrated but more often men and women obscure in their labor, who have carried us up the long, rugged path towards prosperity and freedom.

For us, they packed up their few worldly possessions and traveled across oceans in search of a new life.

For us, they toiled in sweatshops and settled the West; endured the lash of the whip and plowed the hard earth.

For us, they fought and died, in places like Concord and Gettysburg; Normandy and Khe Sahn.

Time and again these men and women struggled and sacrificed and worked till their hands were raw so that we might live a better life. They saw America as bigger than the sum of our individual ambitions; greater than all the differences of birth or wealth or faction.

This is the journey we continue today. We remain the most prosperous, powerful nation on Earth. Our workers are no less productive than when this crisis began. Our minds are no less inventive, our goods and services no less needed than they were last week or last month or last year. Our capacity remains undiminished. But our time of standing pat, of protecting narrow interests and putting off unpleasant decisions — that time has surely passed. Starting today, we must pick ourselves up, dust ourselves off, and begin again the work of remaking America.

...

AND

So let us mark this day with remembrance, of who we are and how far we have traveled. In the year of America’s birth, in the coldest of months, a small band of patriots huddled by dying campfires on the shores of an icy river. The capital was abandoned. The enemy was advancing. The snow was stained with blood. At a moment when the outcome of our revolution was most in doubt, the father of our nation ordered these words be read to the people:

"Let it be told to the future world ... that in the depth of winter, when nothing but hope and virtue could survive...that the city and the country, alarmed at one common danger, came forth to meet (it)."

America, in the face of our common dangers, in this winter of our hardship, let us remember these timeless words. With hope and virtue, let us brave once more the icy currents, and endure what storms may come. Let it be said by our children’s children that when we were tested we refused to let this journey end, that we did not turn back nor did we falter; and with eyes fixed on the horizon and God’s grace upon us, we carried forth that great gift of freedom and delivered it safely to future generations.

On a lighter note:

I was so giddy during the inauguration that I actually had to work up malice towards Bush. I should have gotten out of bed a few minutes earlier, as I just missed the crowd singing the Steam song in his honor. (I blasted it on my computer later that day.)

I did get to see the Carters snub the Clintons after heartily greeting the elder Bushes. I apologize not at all for loving intrigue like this.

And Al Roker gets acknowledged by the new President! Did the President do this so that he would be two degrees removed from Seinfeld?

I Know Two Jeff Johnsons And They Both Make Me Laugh Out Loud

Johnson once again brilliant in his NFL picks!

Fresh from his $1.15 haircut at the Blagojevich School of Cosmetology, here’s Kevin reading a menu on the sidelines, while the grounds crew uses a spatula to liberate Eli Manning from the turf. Gilbride went with the turkey hoagie with extra iceberg lettuce and a Diet Sunkist, then rattled about six peppermint Life Savers around in his mouth and crawled into an oversized duffle bag for a snooze. See you at the combine, Kev.

My Pineapple Express?

The other night I was looking through Esquire's drinks database and came upon the Dog's Nose. Other recipes I saw online upped the gin quotient, so I poured a bottle of Summit EPA (why waste a perfectly good Summit on an experiment you ask? Well last weekend I finally got paid my case of Summit as winnings in a Sioux/Gophers game bet from four years ago ... this was free beer) into a pint glass, then dropped a 1 ounce shot glass filled with Gordon's London Dry Gin into it. Verdict? It tastes pretty much like a Summit but BAM when you're finishing it up you feel it. Awesome!

King and I January DJ Schedule

Dj set times: 9 p.m.>12:30 a.m.

11-sun> Vinyl Roulette! featuring: Mike 2600 & Mark Mueller

12-mon> E-DAWG!
13-tue> Lisa McGrath
14-wed> JIMMY TWO TIMES
15-thu> Housekeeping with Brian Thomas
16-fri> MISSES McFEELY, 10,000 Leagues Under the Scene & FOCUS
17-sat> BLUNT CITY = James Patrick + Daniel Paul Cortez
18-sun> Vinyl Roulette! featuring: KING OTTO & CAROL (of double trouble)

19-mon> PAUL HARDING of Radio K
20-tue> VINTAGE presented by: Atlantis Audio Archive
21-wed> JIMMY TWO TIMES
22-thu> THE SAINT
23-fri> Derek Olson
24-sat> I ROACH of 3 King Sound System
25-sun> Vinyl Roulette! featuring: ANTON & Christian Fritz (of Mpls Ltd.)

26-mon> Kinda Cloudy... with Dj Steely
27-tue> MISSES McFEELY
28-wed> VERB X
29-thu> Replicant Soul is Dj TK
30-fri> TREEHOUSE RECORDS
31-sat> RYAN SIMATIC

King and I
Thai Lounge & Restaurant
1346 Lasalle Ave S.
Minneapolis, Minnesota 55403
Tel. 612.332.6928

Nice Effort Goofers!

The ill Don Lucia (get well soon) didn't make the trip to Grand Forks this weekend. Apparently neither did his team.

My back was bothering me this week and standing always feels better than sitting. Tonight I watched a good portion of the game standing while watching the Sioux. But not as much as the Gopher hockey team did.

The Gophers are playing somebody named Cade Fairchild on defense. He is brutal! And who the hell names their son "Cade"? Might as well name him "Kick My Ass On The Playground."

Saturday Night Update: Ummm, what he said last night all over again. Dominating wins by UND of 6-3 and 6-1, chased the Gophers starting goalie out two nights running. The Fighting Sioux ... "We're comin'! We're comin!"

Fact Is Funnier Than Fiction

Over the years my good friend (and blog commenter) Joel and I have been emailing each other real-news headlines that read like headlines from The Onion. A quick search of my email program pulled up these:

"Newly discovered tape captures Lennon and McCartney giggling"

"Zubaz are back"

"Syrian diplomat hopes his blog will help thaw chilly relations with U.S."

"Abbas sees no peace deal with Israel this year"
(this one ran in November)

"Benzair Bhutto's daughter honors mom with rap song"

UPDATE: Early Friday a.m. the main Yahoo page blessed us with another one: "Craze over touch-screen gadgets not shared by the blind."

UPDATE #2: When it rains it pours, Friday afternoon Yahoo had this one: "Amy Winehouse targeted by Islamic extremists."

I Don't Wanna Go To School Work

I haven't worked since December 23rd and I gloriously ended that workday with a walk over to the 331 Club (a client is a few blocks away), where they have three brands of rye and I was able to have a couple of Old Overcoat and ginger ales, write in my new bubblegum-colored notebook (good job Mead, coming up with new colors!), and contemplating writing a poem about daytime bartenders.

The past many days have featured more writing and daydreaming about how to spend my Christmas money and gift cards. But come Monday I gotta start dealing with obligations and deadlines and reality. To top it off, it's Gopher Week meaning Friday and Saturday will be filled with all the anxities involved with a Sioux/Gophers series. (Wish we coulda played the Goofs this weekend and Bemidji State next weekend, that would have worked out a lot better.) Oh, and I got a real cool hat for Christmas, but it's maroon and gold so superstition prevents me from wearing it this week.

I really don't want to work but I guess I should feel fortunate to still have work to do. Those Heinekens next Friday night will taste nice.

Now What Do I Do?

Today I finished watching the entire series run of Homicide: Life on the Street. I started with it exactly eight months ago and have done the math: 122 episodes, meaning that I averaged viewing an episode every other day. I loved this show so much: the characters, the writing, the dialogue. No wonder this is only the second show where I had dreams that I was part of the show, or to be more precise: I had dreams where the show was reality and I was part of the homicide squad. (The only other show I've dreamt about in this way? The White Shadow, of course.)

Tonight I watched Homicide: The Movie, which came out nine months after the series' end. "The one case so important, every detective is back." Stan Bolander, Kay Howard and Frank Pembleton all return, and the Bayliss/Pembleton umm, partnership/friendship is finally reconciled.

It's too bittersweet of an evening to write about this show in any way of quality, instead I'll drop a couple of quotes from the final season and the movie:

"I'm too damn sober." - John Munch

"Guys like you and me? Work is where we shine." - Stan Bolander

Schadenfreude

The Vikings were almost beat by Slingin' David Carr and the New York Football Giants, but actually won and advanced to the playoffs. It's no substitute for a Purple choke job, but watching the Dallas Cowboys lose their last two games has been rather enjoyable (sorry, Joel.)

Last week they gave up those two long runs late in the game against Baltimore. Very funny. Today in their "effort" against Philadelphia they got blown out by 38 points. Hilarious.

I'm sure everybody is quick to blame the late-season woes of Tony Romo, Wade Phillips losing his team, and also the antics of Terrell Owens. I have an easier explanation: it's the Curse of the Pacman. Adam "Pacman" Jones is maybe the most despicable person in sports, just read his legal troubles section at Wikipedia. For some reason, the Cowboys just had to have him this season and they went from being last season's NFC East champions and a preseason fave pick a few months ago to win the Super Bowl to being out of the playoffs. Pacman also fumbled away a kickoff return late in the first half today, allowing the Eagles to kick a field goal as time ran out.

The team that traded away Pacman? The Tennessee Titans went from being 10-6 and a wild card last year to being 13-3 and the #1 seed in the AFC this year.

Fire Wade Phillips? Sure, you just know Jerry Jones is gonna do it this week. Dumping the Pacman would be an even better move.

"Again."

There was nothing better to wash down the Sioux's loss to Michigan State tonight (UND has once again found away to shoot pucks right into the middle of the goalie's chest) than catching the last couple hours of Miracle on ABC. ABC? Yep, that's right. The same network that refused to show the USA vs. USSR 1980 medal round Olympic hockey game live. Anybody who tells you they saw that game live on TV is lying or had a Canadian TV feed.

Miracle? The always-underrated Kurt Russell was amazing. I'll take a solid Russell performance over a histrionic Nicholson one every time. And don't forget Noah Emmerich, who didn't have to say much because his facial expressions said it all.

And here's the thing. If you have a couple of rye and gingers in you before you sit down to watch Miracle, your allergies will act up. Ragweed in December? Yeah, it sounds strange, but when Ralph Cox got cut my eyes started watering. Same during the aftermath of the game against the Soviets and especially during the medal ceremony post-national-anthem everybody-on-the-medal-stand moment. Know your dosage or your cheeks will get wet with tears.

Vikings Choke Job Checklist

League's best running back fumbles three times and loses two? Check.

Last week's NFC offensive player of the week fumbles twice, loses one, and lets a snap go over his shoulder? Check.

Team's best receiver fumbles away a punt return, actually not a so much a return as letting it bounce off his numbers? Check.

A finally improved defense ineffective? Check.

Sorry, Purple fans, you are going to have to cheer for Green Bay to beat Chicago tomorrow night or Houston to do it next week as you know if the Vikings have to win a game to make it to the playoffs, they're not going to do it.

Also: Very enjoyable article reminiscing on the Purple's glorious choke job against the Falcons ten years ago. (If they win that game, they get destroyed by the Broncos in the Super Bowl anyway!)

And: Reusse catches up with the Weeping Blondes, who are even hotter with age.

Greatest Running Back Ever?

I was asked yesterday, if "Gail/Gale" could be a man's name. I automatically said "Gale Sayers", which fell on deaf ears. Oh well, it gave me an excuse to look up Sayers highlights on YouTube.

What A Genius

During the UND vs. Harvard hockey webcast, the Crimson's color guy stated during the game that both teams were doing better on their penalty kills than at full strength, his reasoning being that the skaters had more room to move. Then with under a minute left and Harvard trailing by a goal, they pulled their goalie for an extra skater. Color guy unleashed this gem:

"I don't know how much of an advantage this will give them."

And he once again brought up the "room to move" theory. If this guy is a Harvard alum, they should revoke his diploma.