Here's An Easier Way: Go To Google Images And Type "Virgin Mary"

People who see the Virgin Mary in trees, clouds, and hospital windows are pretty damn funny. Some window gets an acidic reaction that makes a random formation and you decide it looks like the mother of Jesus so you bring a chair to the hospital's parking lot so you can look at the window. You might not be the brightest person out there and I hope you're not skipping work to prove it ... but hey: Worshipping a woman is cool in my book.

And which vision do you believe in more: The Virgin Mary in an egg salad sandwich or the annually-guaranteed improved Vikings defense?